Oh my God,
i'm getting older!!!! 19, last teen year!!! oh i'm gonna make use of that!!!!
got a looot of plans in my head... wont say them, but i'll say that i'll do stuff, that as i grow older i'll be happy i did at a young age, w ma yjini 6ofoola met2a5era!!!
i still feel young!!! and i still feel irresponsible! i steel have the child inside me! and i hope it never grows old!!!
yesterday my friends and sister threw me a surprise Birthday!!! it was totally unexpected!!!!! i went to luch with my sis and her husband w when i went back home i found all my friends there with the cake!!!! they got me an i-pod, to stop steeling my twin's !!! and they got us a karaoke thing!!!
friends are god's special gift!!! i truly believe in that!!!! and sisters are god's special blessing!!!
i dont know how my life would have been without them!! they're people who believe in you and stand by your side in good and bad moments!!! they are people to either draw a smile or erase a tear!!! they leed you to success, and believe in your dreams and tell you its always possible, and actually make them look like reality, while others assure you with a nasty smile that it's an only dream that fades away with time!!!!!
for you my friend, i thank you for every part you built in me!!! i love you all!!! and wish you the best in life!!! i believe in all of you!!! and i'll be there whenever you need me!!! to witness your dreams come true! love you all mwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah :x

I need a break,

I lost my soul,
I can hardly know myself,
I miss me,
I need me,
I fear me!
Where have I gone?
Where was I all these years?
I was following the wrong path,
A blocked path,
A path with no ending,
Not even a glimpse of light,
But am no longer there,
I turned away and ran so fast!
It was very hard!!
I fell in every memory,
Memories in this road were clustered,
Stiffened into hard rocks,
And in order to pass them,
You have to pick them up,
One by one,
That was the only way to get out!
But I picked them up,
And here I am in the road I first walked in,
Thinking that it was the best road to witness,
Here I am with all the memories,
Good ones and bad ones!
What path am I going to choose now?
What would I do with these rocks?
I can't let go of them!
There's a part of me insisting to take them with me,
Wherever I decided to go,
They should stick with me,
They're a part of me!
But a part that I abandoned
So here I am standing in the beginning of all roads,
Sitting down,
Surrounded with killing memories!
Stuck in the middle of no where!
All roads seem the same now,
They're all dark and empty,
Different people going to one,
Others running out of that same road,
With eyes full of tears,
Torn clothes,
Some even scream,
Some hesitate to try any of the paths,
Fearing what's waiting for them,
Not wanting any surprises!
But what would they do?
Are they going to rotten in one place?
a dry place,
where the only sound is your breath,
or your tortured thoughts!
And that's when I realized!
I shouldn't waste my time,
In a life that I only live once,
Witnessing other people struggle,
Getting in and out,
I had to experience the same thing they're passing through,
After all this is what life should be like,
Explore the path you're in,
Learn from it,
Add some candles through your path,
Lead others,
Give them hope,
Leave some footprints,
And never surrender,
Every path holds it's own obstacle and tragedy,
Every path holds a river of tears,
And endless anger,
But the key to continue and move forward,
Lies between your hands,
Choose the only path you love and admire,
The path you'd love to end in,
The path you'd lighten with your own sacrifice!
We sometimes choose the wrong path,
We move just like dead bodies
Not wanting to light any candles,
Nor are we willing to mind being pushed,
Or even forced down,
We just want to end it,
But the problem is,
There is no end,
The journey isn’t about how far you go,
Or where will you die,
There isn’t a score,
There isn't a hidden treasure we're looking for,
The beauty lies in the journey you're passing through,
The candles you light,
The discoveries you make,
The footprints you leave behind,
The closed doors you opened,
Enjoy your journey,
And if you found yourself running the wrong race,
Looking for an illusionary "finish line"
Or you found out that the end line is just a mirage,
The closer you get,
The further it goes,
Then it's not too late to change your path,
A path you'll walk in with your head high,
Knowing that you might suffer,
Welcoming the suffer,
Be someone to look up to,
Someone people would look at,
And just by knowing that you're in that path,
Would go the same road you entered,
Following YOUR footprints,
Learning about your adventure!
Seeing your dreams,
And accomplishing those you haven't dreamt of,
Inspired by your own!

Xx Aisha xX

EyEs
You asked me to look deep in my soul,
You wanted to know what's hidden beneath,
You wanted to breath me,
Look deep into my eyes,
The only door to my soul,
All my hidden fears,
My hidden love and hate,
My hidden surrender,
My old stories,
And new hopes,
My rusty tears,
Tears of happiness and joy,
Tears of regret and surrender,
But don't look for long,
I might surrender to tears,
I don’t know why but I feel like crying,
Don’t look for long,
Coz that makes me feel naked,
Ashamed,
Don't look for long,
Or don’t look at all,
Coz that’s my hidden door,
that's my closed book,
the one I don’t want anyone to read,
but would you be able to read?
Would you understand my eyes,
Would you get into my soul?
I don’t think so,
You see, you don’t understand,
You don’t feel me,
You can never breathe me,
That takes someone who loves,
Someone who already got into that door,
And not by asking any questions,
Knew my past,
Knew my fears,
Knew what I like and dislike,
You ask for a door?
It's right in front of you,
I gave you more than one chance to enter it,
I showed you more than a dozen of keys,
But you're not willing to understand,
Not willing to grab the key and keep it in your heart,
You'll never read my eyes,
You'll never enter my soul,
Here I am crying,
The door is soaked in tears,
But that doesn’t matter,
Coz it's clearing the way,
My eye doesn’t want you to enter my soul,
It's clearing your last footprints,
I'll cry today,
And maybe other days,
But not for losing you,
But for clearing you out of my way,
Can't believe,
That I was sending you messages threw them,
Can't believe I told you I love you threw them,
I'm just glad you never translated my gaze,
I'm just glad that you're just a player,
Looking for different doors,
Go look else where,
Coz the only door, That can be unlocked,
Is not for you to appreciate!

Xx Asiah xX